Stream of Consciousness: FC Dallas at Seattle
October 25th, 2009 . 9:21 pm . By: DJ WalkerIt’s been such a weird season. For me, too many distractions caused by my old nemesis, “Real Life” to write many columns, or for that matter, to even watch many matches. Of course I kept up with what was going on, but I felt disconnected to the team somehow. We didn’t make it to even one game at Pizza Hut Park this year. Not one. For FC Dallas, pure insanity. Pitch gone, Dominic gone, KENNY gone, DREW gone. A horrid start. Followed by a not-much-better mid-season. Gloom, despair, and agony on us. And then all the sudden, with a handful of games left, it’s like the third act of “Hoosiers”, with Jeff Cunningham as Jimmy. (There’s a cheap joke here about Dax looking kind of like Ollie, but I for one refuse to make it). Just a really weird season. So we come to the last two weeks of the season, and it looks like, if the planets align just right, we could actually make the playoffs. I refused to get my hopes up, at first. Let’s face it, how often do the planets align for this team? Never. We’re like the Badluck Schleprock of American soccer. So now, it’s 9:30 on Saturday night, and as FC Dallas takes the field, Toronto has lost (actually, they got SHELLED by the MetroBulls), DC has tied Kansas City, Colorado has lost (that’s a shame, isn’t it?), and, finally, we have the tiebreaker on New England even if they win tomorrow. Even though it seemed metaphysically impossible at the beginning of September, we actually make the playoffs with a win tonight. The planets, for once, have aligned for FC Dallas. Now we just need to win. I almost didn’t even watch this game, and I almost didn’t write about it. I figured it could be bad mojo for me to get involved this late in the season. I didn’t want to bring a curse upon the team on one of the most important nights in its history. But then I remembered that my actions have absolutely no effect whatsoever in any conceivable way on the outcome of this or any sporting even ever contested, and that it was the height of narcissism to believe that they could, and decided to watch anyway. Nice Charlie Davies tribute by the (huge) Seattle crowd in the 9th minute; they were also savvy enough to realize the 9th minute starts at the 8:01 mark of the game, not 9:01 – very encouraging. I’ll bet they even know it’s “offside” rather than “offsides”, and can explain the difference between Bayer Leverkusen and Bayern Munich. I long for the day when it’s hard to get a seat to an FC Dallas game, and we have crowds that sound like that. Although I can do without the marching band. Atiba Harris scores! Atiba Harris scores! Wait, who the heck is Atiba Harris? I really have been out of the loop. George John gets injured, either because he came down wrong on his ankle, or because Freddie Ljunberg viciously hacked him. I’m not quite sure, but I’ll give Freddie the benefit of the doubt, if only because it’s nice to see a guy still playing well into his fifties. I’m surprisingly calm. Probably because I have absolutely no expectations. It’s like an early Christmas present that we’re even here, and if we don’t squeeze into the playoffs, we’ve laid down a foundation for next year. So, as the young people say, it’s all good. Speaking of guys in their fifties, Nate Jaqua just equalized. SON OF A . . . All that stuff I said just now, about no expectations and not being nervous – scratch that. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Only a miracle and Dave Van den Bergh on the line just kept Seattle from going ahead 2-1. Okay, now I want a drink. Yellow Tail to the rescue. Save Darío. Save Darío. Lots of Seattle pressure. Guys, you’re already in the playoffs, pump the brakes a little. Okay, that might be asking a bit much, after all, has the great American philosopher Herm Edwards said “You play to win the game . . . hello!” Free kick for Seattle just outside the box. At first I thought it was a bad call, but thanks the the miracle of DVR technology, it seems Ugo Ihemelu may have just ever so slightly grabbed Ljunberg’s shirt. But just slightly. Probably a good foul, depending on how this free kick goes. Wait for it. Wait for it. Save Darío. Yep, good foul, Ugo. Freddy Montero just tried to break David Ferreira’s leg, and didn’t get so much as a stern look for it. Then he had the nerve to act like he’d been hit by a sniper after David’s shoe brushed against him. If he keeps this up he’ll end up getting a cap for Italy. The Direct Kick coverage of this game, for some reason, is without commentary. I love it. I wish all games were just crowd noise and no talking. Unless it’s Brad Sham, Dave Dir and Bobby Rhine. Or Martin Tyler. Everybody else can just shut up. Steve Zakuani just missed a sitter. In related news, my Flashforward vision showed me dropping dead during an FC Dallas game just like this one. Some guy named Evans, who I’ve never heard of and hope to never hear of again, just scored to give Seattle the lead. I should have known better than to get my hopes up about this. Oh the words going through my head that I’m not putting down on the page. Most of them start with mother. Maybe I really did put a jinx on the boys. I am kind of a narcissist, you know. Or maybe I’m a solipsist. I get them mixed up. Kind of like Aztecs and Mayans. In any case, maybe I shouldn’t have bothered. Van den Bergh just misses. Two minutes left plus stoppage. Wahl comes in for Seattle. Grant Wahl plays for Seattle? Huh. I do believe in miracles, both in the theological sense and the Al Michaels sense, but I think the brilliant late season run is over. And…… it is. Screw you Drew Carey. See you next season, when I hope to go to more games and write more Streamage. Unless the group consensus is that I’m bad luck and should keep my thoughts to myself. Let me know. 5 Comments Comments RSS TrackBack Identifier URI Leave a comment |
“But then I remembered that my actions have absolutely no effect whatsoever in any conceivable way on the outcome of this or any sporting even ever contested, and that it was the height of narcissism to believe that they could, and decided to watch anyway.”
Observer Effect/Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle. Hey, DJ! It’s all your fault!
DJ,
welcome back. Like you said, at least they’ve set the table for next year. Amazingly, they’ll even get the fifth draft pick and allocation slot, too. Not a terrible consolation.
That game was painful, but I’ll take that over the apathy of months prior.
Rex: Good point. I should’ve taken quantum physics into account, but in my defense, I don’t think it had been invented yet when I was in college.
Steve: Your very apt comment puts me in mind of something the great American educator Edward Rooney once said: “Between grief and nothing, I’ll take grief”.
“But then I remembered that my actions have absolutely no effect whatsoever in any conceivable way on the outcome of this or any sporting even ever contested, and that it was the height of narcissism to believe that they could, and decided to watch anyway?
Wow I don’t hear many bloggers or sports fans talk like this.
It was nice to see everyone at Pizza Hut Park get so excited about the game. It was pretty intense watching it in that atmosphere.
just want to compliment the author, a pleasure to read…